Valentine’s Day has just been and gone; while it can be a sweet occasion, full of hopeful anticipation and romantic possibility; we know for many others, it quietly stirs feelings of sadness, loneliness, or discomfort – especially when relationships have been disappointing, absent, or painful.
What is often presented as a celebration of love can instead become a mirror, reflecting unmet needs, old wounds, and a longing to feel chosen and cherished.
For countless people, this day can intensify a sense of isolation. Some avoid it altogether, hoping it will pass unnoticed. Others feel the ache of comparison or the weight of expectations they no longer know how to meet. These responses are more common than we often allow ourselves to admit.
As adults, we hold a powerful superpower: choice.
We can remain stuck in patterns of detachment or avoidance, numbing loneliness through distraction, food, alcohol, or over-giving to others.
Or we can choose courage: allowing ourselves to start looking inwards as a path toward deeper self-understanding and compassion. In doing so, we begin to listen more closely, befriend our inner child, and reconnect with parts of ourselves that learned early on to survive by putting others first.
May this Valentine’s Day, and the day’s to come, invite a meaningful realisation of what your heart truly desires and what you continue to put up with no longer serves you. Celebrate and honour self-love. After all, the most important relationship you will ever have is the one you have with yourself. It is about believing, perhaps for the first time, you are worthy of love, care and gentleness.
If this reflection resonates, you are not alone. Many people seek therapy during life transitions – after heartbreak, during periods of loneliness, or when long-held patterns of over-giving begin to feel unsustainable. Therapy can offer a compassionate space to explore complex trauma, reconnect with your sense of self, and begin cultivating relationships that feel safer and more fulfilling – starting with the one you have with yourself.
Tina is available for Psychology appointments. Book online below.